The Weekly Bugle: Into The Weeds Of The Surfing Week
Chopes' Olympic flex, The Mad Hueys and the oldest trick in the book, rashie fashion, foil madness and handmade spear guns.
Teahupo'o Smears
Imagine Kevin Guntress, fourth whiskey and sixth dart in, watching the Paris Olympics from his Ontario bungalow (known by the dads in the street as “The Fungalow" and by the mums as “Fat Kev’s shack"). He's interested in boxing and weightlifting, will do the Finals of the athletics and has developed a recent, but intense, interest in womens beach volleyball and pole vaulting. Then, suddenly, smeared across his 98” flatscreen is the blue-green beautiful death march of a 10-foot Teahupo’o wave, being negotiated by a 5’8” Italian. Will Kevin not be entertained? Of course he fucking will. This wave ridden by local, and Olympic athlete, Kauli Vaast yesterday, just a couple of weeks before the Olympic surfing is due to start shows what is possible at the wave. Surfers already know, but a large chunk of the rest of the world may be about to find out.
Rashie Fashion
Kauli’s been busy. This week the Tahitian also dropped his collaboration with the House of Dior where he “showcases fluid synergy in the blues of a tailored rash guard.” I once wore a rashie to a Peniche Nightclub back in 1997. I was roundly ridiculed and physically abused (though that might not have been all rash guard-based). Still nice to know I was 25 years ahead of the rashie fashion curve.
The Oldest Trick In The Book
Just how The Mad Hueys turned their base surf, fishing and humour into a successful apparel brand could be explained by this clip here. It may not be original, or smart and it may not be clever, but fuck it made me laugh.
A Shout Out To The King
One of my favourite surf shots ever is this one taken by Andrew “Shorty” Buckley of my mate Andy King. Taken at Occy’s Left in Sumba, this was on a boat trip less than two years after Kingy suffered a coward’s punch to the head, fractured his skull, went into a coma, and lost all his hearing. He was told he’d never walk, let alone, surf again. A few months before this trip he had his first cochlear implant, which gave him some of his hearing back. Unfortunately on the second day, after about 25 beers, the processor that fitted behind his ear and pulls in sounds from the receiver placed under the skin fell off and dropped into the Indian Ocean. King spent the next ten days learning to lip read, laughing a lot and ripping. I did a spot check on the Nihi, and the wave known as Gods or Occy’s Left, on the Surf Bugle last week and the memories came flooding back. Anyway it’s a great photo, and a good reason to shout out to the King. And that’s not just because he became a paid subscriber this week. Though it definitely doesn’t hurt. And if anyone else feels like this content deserves a financial contribution, I’ll write about you too.
Foiled Again
For a guy who has never foiled, and undoubtedly never will, I am constantly amazed at the sport’s progression. I swear this tech is going to change surfing forever. Cash Berzolla Mach-10ing the beejezzes out of this perfect, massive J-Bay wall is the latest warning.
Gun Control
Some of my best friends are spearfisherman. Laurie Towner isn’t one of my best friends, but ever since I watched him surf one of the best Backdoor waves I’ve ever seen ( I, obviously was on the sand spectating) when he was a grom in 2005, I've followed his surfing and fishing careers closely. Anyway, his latest post on the making of his own handguns left me, as usual with Loz, wanting more.